The Beat That Stole My Heart

A Personal Narrative by Giuditta Paci. February 2nd, 2013. The Beat That Stole My Heart… It seems like some things have never happened to me or I am an alien from some other distant planet. “Human beings” surprise me, make me cry, make me laugh and make me happy. That Saturday night, my “alien being” went out the house in desperate search of meaningful paths, beautiful smiles, the sounds of music and something that would make my heart beat just a little faster.
Summer was almost over and I was thinking about how strange was the world and how could I possibly find someone to share some interesting conversation and a good dance before the warm and hazy summer nights will turn in to cold and lonely winter nights. It is not that I was broken hearted by the thought that my patience has come to its end, and that I may have to spend the last few weeks of summer wondering about a possible date that will never happen. I looked at the vast starry night-sky and continued to walked towards the Bar. I sat there thinking about how I wanted to be another person.
I longed for interaction with the opposite sex. Eventually, I realized what my main problem was. I felt that I could not overcome all the “love” obstacles that life had made me face in the past. I recalled everything I have read in books about love as well as everything that I have experienced myself. In the books everything seemed to be much smoother and easier. My main thought was “how people can possibly spend their whole life together and stay in love? ” specially after ending a ten year marriage only three months ago, and experiencing the big disappointment that love does not last forever.

The music started and made me feel even more stupid: standing alone at the bar, listening to songs about love and relationships, without anyone here with me to dance or have a meaningful conversation with. I was ready to leave and call it a night. I decided to walk outside to breath some air before departing. The summer wind woke me up from my dream and I took a deep breath and looked around. Suddenly I saw this attractive male. He was walking towards me… As there was no one else outside, everyone was inside dancing and having a good time or so I thought.
He definitely caught my attention. As he was getting closer I felt a strange sensation in my stomach… I was nervous and didn’t understand why. I had never seen this person before and yet I felt this strange connection. He came up to me and said, “Hi! Are you enjoying the music? ” I replied “Well, to be honest with you I wasn’t really paying attention. I was getting ready to leave. ” This made him laugh for some reason. I felt a bit irritated as if he had broken my unity with nature and disturbed my thoughts with his presence and questions.
All the sudden I took a good look at him. I hadn’t really before. He was relatively tall, dark hair, and deep blue eyes. His smile reminded me of those toothpaste TV commercials. A perfect smile. He had this smooth but primal Aura to him that made him very attractive and sexy. I could not clearly identify the age, but he looked like he was around 30-36 years old. He seemed so peaceful and yet so full of life and adventure, he was definitely in harmony with himself… He had an edgy style. He was dressed appropriately for this type of event. He looked very much like a “rock star. Which made me even more curious about him, Part of me has always being attracted to that kind of “look” At that point I wanted to know who he was and where did he come from? I didn’t do a great job with that. Anyhow, this is how the rest of our conversation went. Me, “I think I should go home. It’s the same thing here every Saturday. I love being around people, but it’s always the same people. ” –         Him, “Well I guess you are right in a way… Although tonight is different… at least the music is… You should come inside and check out the band. You may just change your mind. He looked at me, smiled, and made the gesture to follow him inside. I agreed to go with him to check out this “Band. ” I thought about how kind of him to invite me in, at that moment I realized that we hadn’t exchanged names yet. I was now following a complete stranger without even knowing their name. That’s smart I thought! Once inside the venue, he went straight on to the stage and sat in front of the drum set. I was shocked. He was the drummer of the “band. ” I have to be honest, I was a little embarrassed with the way I had acted when we were outside.
At this point nothing mattered anymore. The music started playing, and I immediately got captivated by their sounds. My mood had completely shifted from a depressed moody bitch to completely happy girl! Now I was dancing to his beat. My body was moving along with this erotic and Alternative sound. I remember this energy rising thru my spine that made feel alive and aroused. In my mind he was playing for me, or at least that’s what It felt like to me. A couple of times I directed my gaze at him. He was so amazingly handsome and talented. I can honestly say I could see his soul.
He was in a trance like state, just like Shamans when they chant or drum in ceremonies for people who are looking for a way to heal their souls. Now, I was now one of those souls. My soul was not only getting healed but my heart was falling in love. It was not only the music or the way he pulsated on the drums. There was a connection that I had never felt before. I could not understand at that very moment what was happening to me. That night I knew it was going to be the beginning of a whole new chapter in my life. Maybe after all… Those winter nights may not be as cold and long as I thought they would be.